Tuesday, June 14, 2011

The Veil Issue

Let's begin with this: my choices are never meant as judgment of anyone else's choices past or present. I mean it. These are just my personal opinions. I like hearing supportive and conflicting ones because it forces me to examine my motives and either become more confident in them or go back to the drawing board.

Here is where I started on the subject of veils four years ago:

I wanted a fingertip length, double veil with some kind of pretty trim. I had also hoped that it would detach from the comb for the reception leaving just the pretty hair piece behind.

After coming back to my dress (and the wedding) with fresh eyes I've been thinking something more like this:

Scattered flowers in my loose curls, no veil. It's very Midsummer Night's Dream don't you think? Also, I like the idea of little pops of color here and there.

Today when discussing this with someone I heard myself say "well, maybe a small veil. They are kind of ethereal." Hmmm...

Pretty, but not quite me. I'm just not sure. I was leaning heavily towards just flowers, but I also really like this "bridal halo" I found on Etsy:

Now that's a real possibility...Maybe something like this, not this one because Geez Louise where do they get off charging that much for some pretty bent cooper wires?!? I digress, something like this with the flowers? Maybe a few less flowers or maybe none?

I do remember and have confirmed no one is certain of the wedding veil's original purpose. Some sources think it was another symbol of purity and modesty. One site comically suggests it was to keep grooms from backing out of arranged marriages because of the bride's ugliness! I happen to think it falls more along the lines of obscuring the brides features from evil spirits and preventing wedding day misfortune.

There are a lot of wedding day misfortunes in literature and even more wedding traditions based in preventing evil deeds by ghosts or men. It dictated the side the groom and his men stand on, so they have easy access to their swords. It is why bridesmaids originally matched to confuse the evil sprits and rivals for the bride’s affection. It goes on and on. It makes me smile thinking about it.

I know that when I watched Lara's veil go on, I welled up with tears. It made her look that much more bridal. I also know that Sandy not wearing a veil didn't make her any less breathtaking. I'll keep pondering the deterrence of evil spirits and the opinions of those I trust and post when I make a decision. Whatever I decide (in all matters wedding) is not intended as anything more than attempt to make it a day that is deeply meaningful to Michael and I and I will not apologize if it is not what people want or expect.

This one's really pretty too.

I'm not usually big on fabric flowers in the hair, but I'm really drawn to this. Curse you, Etsy and your endless sea of beautiful things how's any girl supposed to make up her mind?.


  1. Whew! Now THAT's a relief! I was taking personally every single decision and opinion you had until you explained it! It's good to know that your wedding is about YOU and not about ME, as I'd thought it was!

  2. It's apparently a common misconception. (:

  3. I think the bridal halo looks like you = ) but I also like the flowers and the original veil idea. Jessica

  4. I like the first set of flowers and think it would go very nicely with your hair color. The halo is beautiful but aside from being expensive it looks like it might get annoying after wearing it for awhile. As for the history of the veil I think it was for practical purposes since women would have to ride long distances for their own weddings and it protected them from the dust the horses kicked up. When carriages were introduced it became less of a necessity and more of a decoration. Although it's funnier to think it protects the bride from a stinky groom :) Aymee


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