Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Bride Meets Gown

When there was a knock on the door I was sure it was Christmas decorations I ordered. Wrong. It was my dress! I can't believe it got here so fast.

It came in a huge white box. Mike cut it open and pushed aside the tissue paper. I don't think I breathed after that until the long white garment bag came out of the box. The long white zip came down in slow motion. There is was. It's real, it's mine. Holy cow, I'm a bride.

I instantly loved the fabric. The champagne color is so much prettier in person. The ivory fabric on the skirt shines through the champagne fabric. It's a really lovely affect. The bodice has an era of 50's glamor about it. The rhinestone belt is exactly the right color green. I really love how simple and beautiful it is. I'm so glad I didn't settle.

She even included a framed sketch of the dress in the box. What a treasure. As my friend pointed out, I have the only dress like this in the whole world. It makes me feel like a movie star. It was such a pleasant experience from start to end I'm so glad I found Pantora by Andrea on Etsy. She did beautiful work. She stayed in contact through out the process giving me her email with Etsy messages weren't getting to her. She finished exactly when she said she would and I received my dress within 48hrs of completion.

It was a fantastic experience, really I'm racked my brain for any criticism and I can't think of one. It was well worth the wait. Excuse me I have a dress to try on.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

That Tops The Cake

It arrived yesterday nestled in this pretty box. With a sticker on the back and a hand written number indicating I have the 2,971st ever made. Nested inside between two pieces of thick styrofoam. Sealed in a plastic bag. Was the cake topper I waited five months for (it was out of stock).

Free from it's packing. So beautiful. Worth the wait.

Close up of the faces.

Photoshoped approximation of how it will look after we paint her hair blonde.

Monday, November 28, 2011

Update Monday!


Done
  • Flower girl dresses arrived.
  • Decided against fairy wings for the flower girls.
  • Ordered the flower girls shoes.
  • Decided on my shoes.
  • Decided against individual wedding programs.
  • Decided to stick with my original flower bouquet
  • Received a picture of my completed wedding dress!!
  • My cake topper arrived today
Looking Forward To
  • My wedding dress arriving this week!
  • Healing from this hip surgery
  • Finishing a rough draft of ceremony and vows (still working on that)
  • Starting on the slide show
  • Holiday Festivities

The girls should be picking up their dresses this week. I can't wait to see those. In other attire news my dress is finished and shipped today. I'm dying to see it and try it on. I'm hoping to gather my girls together when the dress arrives so they can see me in it and get excited with me. Fingers crossed that works out, we'll see.

I went to a memorial for Mike's grandpa on Sunday and there was an amazing slide show. Up until now I thought if I got to the slide show great, if not no biggie. Now I'm determined to do it. It's going to be a lot of work: stalking people for photos, organizing content, scanning and composing the final product. Maybe I should wait until I can enlist help.

December is going to be crazy we're either double(triple on a few) booked or we've got nothing (and those are disappearing) every day. I'm hoping holiday crafting will inspire me to finish some wedding DIY. It'll fly by and then the "I'll do after Christmas" list will become prority.

114 days!

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Dress Denouement

Today was an emotional day. We went to a memorial for Mike's grandpa and my Dad had an accident and went to the hospital. I was exhausted when we got home. So it was a wonderful surprise to find a message from my dressmaker that said:
I'll be done tonight in a few hours
Squeal!!

She sent this picture. I really like my green bling. It's a big improvement over the flower. I'm just so excited that it'll be on it's way to me so soon. I can't wait to try it on! I first found and made contact with my dress maker on July 9th. We discussed changes I wanted to the dress design starting on the 10th. On July 17th I sent all of my measurements. I paid the deposit on the 18th. July 19th she emailed me scanned swatches and mailed some so I could choose the champagne fabric. By the 27th I had gotten the swatches and given her my choice. We conversed all through August while she finished the pattern, bought the fabric and constructed the bodice.

In October she showed me embellishment choices and sent photos. I made the second payment. We decided on an attached petticoat for simplicity. By late November she was just waiting on the ivory lace for the hem. She assured me it would be done by the end of the month. True to her word it'll be done tonight and on it's way to me tomorrow. Merry early Christmas!

If you told me I'd be getting married in a custom dress a year ago I wouldn't have believed it. Now our creation is almost done and my weddings a few short months away. I'm so glad I didn't settle for a dress that wasn't right, now what to do with the one hanging in my closet...

Just as I was wrapping up my post she finished the dress and sent me a picture! It's all done. Just like I wanted fitted rusched bodice, green bling, flowy champagne fabric on the skirt, no train, and lace detail on the hem. Sigh... I showed Mike the picture (sue me, I wanted to share my excitement with someone), but I feel funny posting a finished picture of the dress here. Forgive me, but you'll have to stay in suspense.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Decisions Check In

A decision is the selection between possible actions. A choice is the selection between two or more objects. according to Wikipedia, so apparently I've made a slue of both.

I've posted the major ones as I've gone along, but I thought it would be nice to let you know about the stuff I left hanging. Let's start from the most recent and work our way back, shall we?

Fairy wings:
It occurred to me during my research today that 2yr old girls may not want to wear wings. I had thought a couple pictures and the ceremony weren't too much to ask. Now I'm worried that the girls won't keep them on long enough for pictures, which would be so sad. I mean am I just kidding myself with this idea? They'll have the flower wreathes, dresses, tights and shoes without considering wings. If they're attached with elastic Riley won't last more than 10min. Hmmm...
Update- We're going to skip them. They're nonessential and I don't want to fight with toddlers on the day of if I can help it.

Brides' Shoes:
I think I've decided on my shoe, but I'm so nervous because I wear 2.5 in girls usually and the one I want starts at a 5 in women. I have worn size 5 in the past so it's entirely possible they could fit great, but if they don't they've ruined me for all other shoe options. I've made no progress on flower girl shoes. I don't know what color goes with sage. Hopefully, I'll get some feed back on my post and figure it out.
Update: I'm going to order the green sequin flats I found on Etsy. Their website says: Our shoes are TRUE to marked size but have a snug fit. We recommend ordering a half size larger. So I think the 5 will work. Worst case scenario they'll let me send in a pair for them to cover with sequins.

Flower Girl Shoes: I got these. On sale and free shipping. Use the holiday sales to your advantage budget brides.

Programs:Now I'm torn between two kind of opposite ideas. First, I like the idea of doing just one poster sized program at the end of the aisle...The other possibility is an interactive wheel (sound familiar?) style. I guess I never got out abandoned save the date idea out of my system, but can you blame me these are pretty sweet.
Update: I want to do a chalkboard at the end of the aisle instead of individual programs. Part of my reluctance to scrap them was because of the tree astrology I found on Martha Stewart Weddings. I've come to the conclusion that it's not very green, budget friendly or practical timewise to make just shy of 100 programs. It's definitely not a priority.

Bride's Bouquet: At first I loved my bouquet and that I was the only one with one. It made it more special. Than I started considering a brooch bouquet
Update: I'm sticking with my original flowers, but pinning a lavender fairy cameo brooch to the ribbon around the stems. Compromise-ish.

Friday, November 25, 2011

Wing-ing It

Today I ordered the flower girl shoes because the website was having a black Friday sale plus free shipping. Fingers crossed their feet don't grow too much before March. So that leaves wings, because they're my little fairies. I started looking around again and came up with a few options.

I started with Etsy and was immediately drawn to these:

They're sewn from cotton fabric. They made me wish I could sew. Great idea, durable washable wings. I love how different they are. That being said they're not quite as whimsical as the rest of the ensemble. Apart from that they weren't offered in an appropriate fabric. They attach around the front with big bows. Which is adorable for dress up and more comfy than elastic, but I want something more discreet for the wedding.

The next pair of wings to catch my fancy were:

These are on sale right now. I like that they're small and the copious color options. I just hate the big flower in the middle. At this point I decided to look else where.

I found these on Amazon:

No big flowers and they're reasonably priced. I like the triple wing design. They're budget friendly, but they're a little boring. The other option is to DIY some and I found a tutorial, but I'm on the fence about at least until I enlist help.

It occurred to me during my research today that 2yr old girls may not want to wear wings. I had thought a couple pictures and the ceremony weren't too much to ask. Now I'm worried that the girls won't keep them on long enough for pictures, which would be so sad. I mean am I just kidding myself with this idea? They'll have the flower wreathes, dresses, tights and shoes without considering wings. If they're attached with elastic Riley won't last more than 10min. Hmmm...

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Gratitude in Planning

It's Thanksgiving and my wedding is 118 days away. I've been comming a little un-glued lately because it feels like it would take twice the time we have left to pull this together. So, in light of the holiday I'd like to express all the thankfulness for what's done, rather than reflecting on what's left to do.

First thing's first, the groom. For all of our ups and downs he's still here and he still wants to be here for the rest of our lives. He makes me laugh and in some ways understands me perfectly. He is an amazing father and a total romantic. I will always be thankful for my wonderful proposal and beautiful one of a kind ring. My perfect botanical garden venue. My custom wedding dress. I'm also very thankful for all the love and support from both of our families. I don't know how I'd plan/have a wedding without them. I'm grateful that I have a very good shot at no hip pain aka muy, muy dancing at my reception thanks to this last surgery. I'm thankful we found someone to execute the edible masterpiece of a cake I envisioned. I'm thankful so many out of town friends are making it I priority to be here. I'm thankful for the love and support from those who won't be able to make it, as well. I'm thankful my wonderful children will share the day with me. I'm thankful for an absolute dream team of vendors. I'm overwhelmed with gratitude for all the friends and family that have lent their creativity and time so far. I am thankful for all the far away folks who get to be a part of the process through the blog.

My first wedding gift, the flower girls dresses. The resourcefulness that has seen me through life and wedding planning this far. The wonderful weddings my friends have been kind enough to share with me through Facebook. My crafting abilities and crafty friends. My amazing wedding date 3-2-1 1-2. All my DIY projects to date. The "me time" wedding planning forces me to take. The excuse to get closer to all the women in my life.

My amazing beyond words bridal party. They are amazing friends and bridesmaids. I don't know how I'd get through the day-to-day without them left alone wedding planning. On the topic of tall (er than me) women, I am super grateful for cute ballet flats as an alternative to heels. Phew. I'm thankful for the option of professional hair and make up, phew again.

I guess I'm not in as bad a shape as it seems sometimes. It's all down hill and I have several weeks of healing before I'll be up and out again so I am also grateful to have wedding projects (DIYs, vows, play list, etc) to keep me distracted and productive. Happy Thanksgiving!

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

True Blue

Other People's Weddings: Jassandra & Kevin

Quick sidebar here: A) The next wedding I attended chronologically was Ryan and Rebekah's. It was lovely, but it was my first outing post major back surgery and I'm too hazy on the details to do it justice. Love you guys! B) I did not attend this wedding physically, but I was there in spirit. So, play on.

Mike and the groom were childhood friends who lost touch and found each other again on the internet. Just like Mike and I. As fate would have it they were marrying in October so I started chatting wedding planning with the bride. Viola, we're all friends now. I digress the wedding was held at the Groom's childhood home, don't you love that?

The bride wore a short, chic white dress with a blue sash. She also had a beautiful hair clip with a blingy white flower and blue feathers. By far my favorite accessory was her signature blue heels, amazing. If I could walk in them I'd totally own a pair. The groom and his boys wore gray suits. I love gray suits. They had the ceremony out on the dock. They I do-ed before an intimate group of family and friends.

The backyard was strung with white Christmas lights, don't you love those? I'm so jealous I can't put lights in the trees at my venue. It's such a romantic look. The centerpieces and bouquets were white daisies, you can't go wrong with daisies. Guest dined on a home cooked buffet of Cuban food lovingly prepared by the bride's family. After dinner there was not only a lovely 3-tiered white cake with blue ribbon embellishment and a silver monogram atop it, but a surprise Tardis grooms cake as well. Always embrace the nerd in your groom (& yourself for that matter).

After dinner guests danced the night away while the DJ played. When they couldn't dance another step the bride and groom were off to their honeymoon suite on the beach before departing for the their honeymoon cruise.

Hopp-ily Ever After

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Dresses for my Fairies!

They arrived Monday afternoon via UPS. The first picture is the dress in sunlight:

This is the dress in the middle of my dining room.

I think they are going to be gorgeous on my pretty girls with fairy wings. It is really starting to feel real now. I'm so glad my kids will be at my wedding. My favorite colors, flowers, food and people. It's going to be an amazing day.

Monday, November 21, 2011

Update Monday


Done
  • Ordered flower girl dresses.
  • Ordered cake topper.
  • Bridesmaids dresses came in and the out of town one was shipped.
  • Lots of shoe research for me and the little ones
  • Received word my wedding dress should be here by the end of the month!
Looking Forward To
  • The flower girl dresses arriving
  • The cake topper arriving (yay, packages!)
  • Finishing a rough draft of ceremony and vows (still working on that)
  • Thanksgiving!
  • Seeing my dress (as always)

I'm still hopping along. Literally because I can't bear weight on my left leg. Healing is slow and boring and not why you're here. I expect flower girl dresses later today. Super fast shipping. I'll also be seeing my cake topper later in the week and my dress after Thanksgiving. Woohoo!

I think I've decided on my shoe, but I'm so nervous because I wear 2.5 in girls usually and the one I want starts at a 5 in women. I have worn size 5 in the past so it's entirely possible they could fit great, but if they don't they've ruined me for all other shoe options. I've made no progress on flower girl shoes. I don't know what color goes with sage. Hopefully, I'll get some feed back on my post and figure it out.

My sister's dress is on it's way to California as we speak. I'm really nervous about it getting there safely. None of my local girls made it to pick theirs up yet so I still haven't seen it. I'm sure they'll pop in post Thanksgiving. It's getting so close now.

121 days!

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Glass Slipper Jr

I'm also looking for flower girl shoes. It's harder than I thought. I found these they're $12 and in the same style as the ones the bridesmaids are wearing. I'm just not sure if silver goes with sage. I want them to be able to wear the shoes again and be comfortable. They only have that one in silver and gold. Ideally, I thought a lavender ballet slipper would be sweet, but I'm a sucker for sparkly. Silver seems like a color they'd wear again. Hmmm...

So, here's a lavendar ballet slipper covered in lace. I think a flower on the dress and the shoe might be too much. These are handmade so they're a lot more ($30).
Upon further reading they too have cloth soles and won't stand must wear and tear.


This one is a lavender ballet flat/mary jane and the rose on the toe has tulle in it for $14. It'd be a lot sturdier than the other purple shoe with the cloth sole

Basic black plus sparkle? When I look at the shoes all lined up I'm less in love light purple.

Opinions?

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Glass Slipper?

Knowing now I'll have my dress in a few weeks, I revisited my shoe options. These were my favorite a few months ago:

I still like them, but besides being more than I want to spend I discovered that they are not avaialble in my tiny size. I decided to check girl's shoes instead of women's. I found these:

These are half the cost and just as pretty. They can be ordered in my size and come in:Off White, Lilac, White, Silver, Navy, Pink and Beige. I'd get them without the flower on the toe of course, but upon further reading these have cloth souls are not meant as street shoes. I know it'll mainly be grass and the dance floor, but that worries me.

I should probably investigate a more supportive opinion, but I adore ballet slippers. I also found this:

Something blue? I know I've got a whole thing going on with green, but these sure are pretty. Upon reflection of my original intenion to do ivory or champagne I couldn't think of a reason not to go with color. I'm far more likely to wear a colored ballet flat again then an ivory lace up ballet slipper. A regular ballet flat would give me some stability. Then I found these.

Honestly, are they too much? I don't think they'll be seen too much under the dress. I'll wear them after the wedding all the time. Feedback is welcome.

Friday, November 18, 2011

A Difference of Opinion

There have been a few, it's only natural. In general wedding planning stirs up a lot of emotions. I find the best way to cope is to wait until you can both articulate your opinons rationally and then ultimately compromise leaving each task in the hands of the one most capable to fulfill it (Organizing-Me, Decor-Mike, etc)

What we can't agree on right now is pre-holidays vs post-holidays. When the prices on things will be better (fabric, etc). I want to check in with some vendors before the rush. Mike says no way. He thinks it will "open a can of worms." He'd perfer getting in touch post holidays when we know everything we need to ask or all of them. I'm hyper aware of all the balances that will be do Mid January-Mid February. My feeling is that we address some small things now and then get everything else handled when we settle up.

Part of me sees his logic and the other part feels like it's just Mike projecting his antisocial feeling onto our vendors. I really need to have a ceremony rough draft, rough playlist and to gather slideshow material this month. I don't see the harm in dropping a line to the baker to let them know I got the cake topper or the florist to go over things one more time.

I figure I'll get going on all the stuff I mentioned and then see how I feel, but I'll probably end up sending a few emails before things get crazy.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Rolling Along...

I asked for a dress update today. She said:
Yes, I have updates, in the car can't get to Etsy right now, but your lace should be in my hand by tues, the store had to order some b/c they didn't have enough of the one I liked. But I think the entire thing will be ready to ship out end of this month.
Yay! I'm so excited. I was feeling some serious dress envy for my bridesmaids. My sister got her dress shipped today, but nobody local has said anything yet about picking up dresses. I hope we all love them in the proper color. I wish I could go pick them all up and deliver them, but I'm not healed enough for driving yet. It just occurred to me typing this that they might hate them. I just thought in their actual sizes and with such great fabric we couldn't go wrong.

I also got a message that the flower girl dresses will be here Monday! Fast shipping. I can't wait for the girls to try them on. Hurray! It's always weird to me when I push, push, push and then step back and things start falling into place. I researched, planned, organized and then I let go. Now, things are moving along. I've heard people talk about being bored during parts of wedding planning, but I haven't experienced that at all. I've been busy or less busy planning never bored. More accurately I've been more distracted by life or less distracted. Right now healing from hip surgery trumps all and somehow progress is still being made on the planning. I must be blessed.

On top of that, my cake topper FINALLY came in. It's been back ordered since July! I completely lost faith I’d ever get it. Turns out all I had to do was stop obsessively checking whether it was in stock. Who knew? I ordered it tonight.

I was browsing Etsy's wedding stuff and I found this store that does amazing custom cake toppers (Anna Crafts), but they were $180-200. Which made me think about how lovely (and affordable) my pick was. So I checked and it was in. Such exciting news today.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Women and Children First

Apparently, some time last week my bridesmaids dresses came in. I found the letter in a pile of junk mail. I was told to expect them in January so this a nice surprise. I sent a text out for the girls to go pick them up and let me know when they have them. I haven't seen them in the right color (emerald dupioni silk) yet so I'm so excited.

With the kids attire all done (minus fairy wings) and bridesmaids dresses in it's starting to feel a lot more real. Any minute now I'll be getting married, which is hard to imagine this week with my broken hip. So, that's the women and children. Now we just have to nail down the men and we're all dressed. Woah.

Speaking of dresses I'm going to be making the final payment on my dress and hopefully receiving it right around Christmas. Can you imagine?!? The year is almost over which means the year I'm getting married in will be starting any minute.

I can't wait for all the girls and kiddos (including me) to try on their clothes. I'll probably share some pictures of the kids and the bridesmaids dresses in the right color, but I don't think I want to post any of me wearing my actual dress. Yay!

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Flower Girls

A friend of mine who has been following the blog offered me a wonderful gift yesterday. She sent me a link to a website and told me to pick out my flower girls dress. I was so excited. I searched the site for about 15min before I had it narrowed down to my top two.

This one was my first choice. I'm not head over heals about the flower, but it's detachable if I wanted to lose it. I like the fabric and the cut of it. It's simple so they'd be comfy and it's flowy like a fairy.

I know this one went a whole other direction, but I really like it. It only comes in pink, red or silver. Not really my colors, but not awful.

After consulting the other flower girl mommy we were sold on my first choice we just needed to work out color. It came in champagne, ivory, sage and lilac. All valid options. My little guy will be wearing an adorable black suit with a lavender paisley bow tie. So, I was leaning toward the sage dress with the lilac rose. Maybe one girl in the reverse?

In the end we decided they should match so they'll be in sage with lilac roses.


Dress

Flower

So, now all my beauties need are shoes and fairy wings. I was sure I'd find wings at Halloween and I didn't. Maybe I'm being overly picky. I think it'll be easier now that we have the dress. I told my ring bearer he had his choice of shoe. I think sneakers would be cute. It's only fair when you ask a 2yr old to wear a suit. I think I'll find some cute slip-ons for the girls or raid their closets post Christmas and find some cute shoes. I'm not worried (any more). Thank you again, Jean.

Monday, November 14, 2011

Update Monday


Done
  • Had Surgery.
  • Started physical therapy
  • Picked out and ordered flower girl dresses.
Looking Forward To
  • Being able to bear weight on my left leg again
  • Finishing a rough draft of ceremony and vows (still working on that)
  • Thanksgiving!
  • Seeing my dress (as always)

Everything went well. I have a newly "crafted" hip joint. I stayed in the hospital until Wednesday. By then I was getting from the bed to the wheelchair and from wheelchair to the bathroom on my own. I also hadn't taken any pain meds since Tuesday night. I hate feeling dopey and worse I hate what they do to my stomach. I came home and hit the ground running. We threw a birthday party on Friday and I went to a baby shower Saturday. After that I laid in bed the rest of the weekend.

Needless to say I did no wedding planning in the hospital, or even over the weekend. I have big plans to finish reading or re-reading all my vow inspiration books and hammering out a cohesive ceremony rough draft. We'll see how it goes. It's nice to be back!

128 days!

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Post Op Bride

Good Morning, everybody! I've survived. Both surgery and my hospital stay. I'm home now. The doctor said evrything went well. He thinks he fixed it. Let's hope. Every hospital employee who came through the door said "So your getting married in March." I started to wonder if it was written on my door or something. They all agree I should be ready to dance again by then.

I'm going to give myself a few days of from the blog and I'll start posting daily again next week.

Monday, November 7, 2011

Update Monday


Done
  • Picked out the ring bearer's duds
  • Sent my sister the dates to book her plane tickets, Yay!
  • Finished re-reading Dear Writer, Dear Actress
  • Settled on the style of the flower girl dress, now to find it.
  • Realized how married I already am.
Looking Forward To
  • Being Post-Operative this afternoonish
  • Finishing a rough draft of ceremony and vows (still working on that)
  • Thanksgiving!
  • Seeing my dress (as always)

I'm probably being wheeled into surgery as most of you are reading this update. That's right this the update Monday where my Ortho show's my bum hip who's boss. Fingers crossed I'll come home with a far more functional hip joint.

Ok, so how cute is the ring bearer outfit? I love it. Obviously, we're ditching the red tie. My little buddy already owns a lavender paisley bow tie! It's going to be great. The holidays season is definitely the time to find budget friendly, adorable kids clothes. So with my little man good to go I was even more frustrated about the flower girls attire. I love that blue Baby Gap dress, but it's the wrong size. I love the neckline and the ruffles of tulle.

The gray Nordstrom dress is available in the right size, but is much more than the budget. I have two flower girls so the budget it set in stone. I thought maybe the white Target dress with the tulle might have been alterable, but no dice. I'll keep searching. Please feel free to make suggestions in the comments.

135 days!

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Photo Inspiration Fron Fun Weddings

Best Flower Girl Ever

Muppets!

I bet their wedding was super fun!

I want my mom to have this much fun!

Saturday, November 5, 2011

& Your Minus One?

We're paying for our own wedding (without credit cards or loans) and we already have two kids so that means we have a limited budget. I wish I could open up the invitation to anyone who was interested in coming, but that's not realistic (and I'm sure that kind of crowd is Mike's worst nightmare). Sometimes I've desperately wish I could whittle the list down to 40 or so people, too. In the end the guest list was a painstaking series of decisions and keeping on budget is an enormous challenge even with a set number of guests.

All the kicking and screaming about manner, smanners I want invite who I want to invite, aside I think we were reasonable and inclusive. Before the save the dates had even gone out I got two phone calls requesting that I add people. I told them both that I was at my maximum and was only inviting friends and family of the bride and groom. Obviously, I invited my friends' spouses and children (even those I don't know well). I'm referring to friends of friends or friends of family that I've never met or haven't seen more than five times, etc.

I'm told most weddings no longer allow plus ones. I think it's a combination of economic recession and how many couples are no longer asking their parents to fund their day entirely. It doesn't bother me a bit though. If you always invite spouses and long term loves and only leave out people you've never met. I don't think that's unreasonable at all.

I was reading a BBC article about The Plus One Dilemma and an etiquette expert (how do they make a living?) said if you're extended a plus one you may bring anyone you want with the only exception being an ex of the bride or groom. Can you imagine? What a sweet person.

The same article talked about not extending a plus one ending friendships. If your "friend" doesn't understand the economic, emotional and rational reason behind your decision and does something as heartbreaking as not only not attending your wedding, but ending your relationship entirely then you're better off without them. I love people and I have another 50-100 people I'd love to have with me that day, but it's not realistic. On top of which, the bottom line is we have to right to invite or not invite anyone we choose it's our party.

Manners and common sense dictate family being a priority, all spouses and long term partners as well as children being invited and that's sensible beyond that there aren't a tremendous amount of guidelines. A lot of highly charged emotional decisions in wedding planning end up being boiled down to dollars and cents (and common sense). So, although an epic entrance would be great you can not waste all that money on elephant rental for the 2min ride to the alter. Think of the poop! It's extreme example, but you see my point.

Besides, now it's not as if the friends and family who won't be there in person won't see pictures and videos in nanoseconds of the event, thanks smart phones, youtube, etc....

Friday, November 4, 2011

Pick A Side

I've read about the not so distant past when a bride was delivered from the household of her father to the household she'd make with her husband. In some cultures it's still the practice. Hence that the "losing a daughter..." saying exists. Lost daughter, gained sons. The reality of joining two people together to form a new family has changed a lot.

In large woman no longer weep as they depart their childhood homes and leave their families behind. We lucky ladies now join the families we were born in with the families of our significant others. We make a bigger stronger support system. We are where we come from and where we're going. It's a wonderful thing.

It's not a day for the bride or even the couple to celebrate as much as two families that are joining because of love. My wedding won't have a bride's side and a groom's side. Everyone's going to sit to together. Their common ground is Mike and I so why be separated on our wedding day?